


The One Time Derek Hale Isn't 100% Attractive

by lonechicken



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Future Fic, Implied Sexual Content, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:41:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27754774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lonechicken/pseuds/lonechicken
Summary: Stiles and Derek have been officially dating for two months when it happens. Everything is perfect and great and amazing, until Stiles gets a front row seat to the one situation where Derek Hale isn't twenty times hotter than any other person on the planet. Stiles may even go so far as to say that he almost looks... unattractive.But how do you break it to the guy you've been pining over for years that his least attractive look is his O-face?
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Comments: 6
Kudos: 124





	The One Time Derek Hale Isn't 100% Attractive

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this last November and completely forgot about it, until I found it again this November. (Three guesses why I'm doing the majority of my writing in November.) The idea just wouldn't leave me alone until I wrote it, and I wasn't going to post it, but it's been a year and it still makes me giggle so I hope it makes you giggle too.

Stiles and Derek have been officially dating for two months when they finally fuck and Stiles discovers the one time in his life that Derek Hale doesn’t look twenty times hotter than any other person on the planet. Stiles may even go so far as to say that he almost looks… unattractive. Like. Badly.

Which Stiles had thought was impossible. He thought he’d seen Derek in every scenario in which it was possible to be unattractive. Angry (it worked on him - the eyebrows really made the smoulder), homicidal (maybe it was the emotional turmoil of ripping out the throat of your last family member for murdering your other last family member, but somehow Derek still managed to pull it off), half dead (even writhing around on the floor screaming in inhuman pain Derek’s _abs_ \- ). 

Even with his stomach ripped open and his organs spilling out Derek still managed to pull off either blue steel or adorably - _something_. Stiles wasn’t sure what. 

But apparently. The one time Derek looked less than perfect… was when he orgasmed. 

It was honestly horrible. The sex itself was awesome. Mind-blowing, even, which Stiles expected, because Derek Hale is a literal walking sex god. But then Derek came and his face, well. 

He had veins sticking out everywhere, especially his neck and forehead. His eyes bugged out of his head and his mouth gaped open, jaw dropped like he was somehow choking. It was something else to behold and Stiles couldn’t look away, torn between wanting to laugh in relief that Derek had a physical flaw and irony that this was that flaw, and wanting to - he didn’t know. Cry? Scream? Run for the hills so he never had to be the one to tell Derek that he was unattractive when he orgasmed?

Because he would have to tell him. They were gonna do this again, this wasn’t a one time only one-night stand thing, no. There had been dates. There had been lead up. They had another date planned already for next week. This wasn’t gonna go away. And this wasn’t something he could keep to himself, it was too good. Too terrifying. 

But who could he tell? Not Scott. Scott had been weirded out they were even dating in the first place and had already sworn Stiles to secrecy on all things sexual preemptively. Surprisingly forward-thinking for Scott.

Not Lydia, for several reasons, all of which meant the conversation would not go over well. She would probably have good advice, but it would be too painful getting there to consider the possibility. Not Malia, she was Stiles’ ex, and Derek’s cousin, so just no. None of the younger members of the group - Liam or Mason or even Corey - he wasn’t close enough with any of them in that way so it would be beyond weird. Definitely not his dad. Not in a million years.

The only person Stiles could think to ask for advice was Danny, and he hadn’t seen the guy since he transferred out of Beacon Hills before senior year even started. Danny was always so smart. Danny would know what to do.

Danny laughs for three straight minutes, and then tells Stiles to never say anything. Ever. Which is good advice, except that Stiles is terrible at keeping secrets. He won’t be able to keep this to himself. Danny shrugs and tells him _it’s your funeral_ , which is the opposite of helpful, thanks _Danny_. But Danny just shrugs again and says he can go somewhere else for advice if Stiles doesn’t like what he has to say. Stiles argues that he wants advice on the best way to break the news to Derek, and _don’t_ isn’t a solution.

So there goes Stiles’ one and only hope for advice, and while he could go to Lydia, Danny already laughed at him enough for one day, and besides he has to meet Derek in like fifteen minutes. They’re just hanging out at Derek’s, but now that their relationship has progressed he doesn’t know if that means they’re _hanging out_ at Derek’s or they’re just gonna hang out, order pizza, watch a movie, and maybe make out a little. Like usual. Like before. God Stiles can’t even handle that much now that he has this big secret. He’s gonna be fidgeting and awkward no matter what they do. It’s hopeless. He should just not go.

He goes. Derek notices something is up pretty much the second he walks through the door, but he just raises an eyebrow and doesn’t say anything about it. He’s the best. Stiles really doesn’t want to have this conversation.

They settle on the couch and Derek has his arm along the back of it behind Stiles. There’s popcorn between them and Netflix loaded on the TV, and Stiles feels more awkward than he ever has before. Which is really saying something. He’s completely frozen, but also his leg may be bouncing all over the place, he can’t tell. He can tell his palms are sweating. And he thinks his eye keeps twitching. 

Derek asks his opinion on a few movie options and Stiles shrugs and gives one-word answers until Derek finally gives up with a sigh, puts down the remote and backs off, turning on the couch to face Stiles.

“What’s wrong,” he says.

Still glances at him, then away. It’s best to just get it out there, right? Or maybe he should take Danny’s advice, just push it to the back of his mind, lock it up tight and never speak of it. He can do that, right?

“You look really unattractive when you cum,” Stiles blurts.

Derek just stares at him.

“I’m sorry, Danny told me not to say anything, but I can’t stop thinking about it. You look like you’re dying, dude. You don’t even look like you’re dying when you’re actually dying. I don’t get it. It’s the weirdest fucking thing and I can’t — ”

Derek snorts. Actually snorts. Then he chuckles. Then all of a sudden he’s full-on laughing, head thrown back, body shaking, arm gripping his stomach like his abs already hurt.

Stiles trails off into silence, mouth still hanging open on a half-formed word until Derek chokes out — 

“You too.”

And just. What?

“Oh my god, I wasn’t gonna say anything, it’s not that big of a deal but you kind of — your whole face tenses up and you look like you just stuck a whole lemon in your mouth and it doesn’t fit but it’s the worst thing you’ve ever tasted.”

Derek is still laughing and Stiles is still so confused. He thinks he knows what’s going on, and this is going better than he thought it would, but —

“That’s so unfair!” Stiles flails and falls back against the couch. “You get to look like a fucking greek statue ninety-nine point nine percent of the time and we both look stupid during sex? No! I call foul, I had one chance at being on equal footing here, at beating you in the looks department just once…”

Derek isn’t laughing anymore, he’s just staring at Stiles with this ridiculously fond look in his eye, and Stiles doesn’t know what to do with that.

“What,” he says.

Derek shakes his head, and his mouth curls up just a bit at the corners. “I love you,” he says.

“What,” Stiles croaks this time, his voice suddenly very much caught in his throat.

“I love you,” Derek says again, and he leans in to kiss Stiles on the forehead of all place which is just —

Stiles melts a little bit, to be honest. He sinks deeper into the couch and his fingers reach out of their own accord and latch onto Derek’s arm. He looks up into his boyfriend’s eyes — his ridiculously beautiful and complicated swirly colourful eyes — and okay yeah, he sees it. Derek loves him.

“I love you too,” he breathes out.

Derek grins down at him. “I know,” he says.

And dammit, using Star Wars references is cheating. It’s tacky and overused and the most romantic thing to ever happen to Stiles. So maybe it’s okay, he thinks as Derek leans down to kiss him, on the lips this time, if sometimes they both look stupid. At least they look stupid together, and it’s not gonna change them.


End file.
